the first step is admitting you have a problem, right?
but right now it feels like trying to take a single step over a gaping chasm.

please, build me a bridge; give me a few hours and the chance to put my feet in front of one another a few more times. then, perhaps, i can get to you.

i have not been screaming at night. i have been tensing up, letting out a nervous "oh," but leaving the frightened exclamations somewhere else. (maybe it is because i know nobody can hear me; maybe it is because i am in my mother's house; maybe it is because things might be getting better; maybe it is because i am gaining control)

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